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5 Reasons Why Office Romances Go Bad

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Office romances are nothing unusual today, in fact they are not even a new occurrence, our acceptance of them as a natural evolution of office relationships has seen many of these bloom in the open from out of the closest. Our acceptance of the office romance does not necessarily indicate that it is a good thing, they are still detrimental to the professional work environment, particularly when they go bad.

Office romances are ultimately unsuccessful in the long run, relationships can be difficult enough but the office relationship can be doomed from the start. Let’s look at the 5 biggest things (disasters) that destroy office romances.

Dating Someone At Work Disaster #1: Lack of Privacy

Office romances suffer from serious lack of privacy from both peers and each other. It is usual for couples to have the occasional “spat”. Generally these minute conflicts are over before they start, but when they occur within an office environment, things normally get blown out of proportion.

Well meaning co-workers will offer advice and insight to the disagreement, too often his good advice will draw attention to a point related to the argument that neither lover thought considered in the first place. When the argument should have been over with, up pops “and another thing”.

Sadly, not all coworkers are so well meaning, either. For whatever twisted reason, spite, jealousy, immaturity or all of these things, some co-workers will intentionally add insinuation and ammunition to the argument and encourage its continuation. As to quote the beautiful Kimee Luv (from GetThePerfectMan.com), “Lack of privacy is the death of any relationship!”

Dating Someone At Work Disaster #2: Contact friction

Very few couples can survive spending 24-7 together. People are individuals, they grow separately and grow together separately to create a union. If no individual development occurs, the union becomes simply a single entity, conflict arises as an individual craves for growing space, and “self” time. An individual becomes irritated as a result of this contact friction and ultimately looks to the source of their annoyance, their 24-7 partner.

Office relationships suffer not only at home from contact friction but also in the office. If an individual was a little bothered by some misdemeanor from home, the continued contact in the office offers no recovery time escalating feelings of resentment.

Dating Someone At Work Disaster #3: Job competition

Often co-workers are in competition with each other for promotions, bonuses and the likes at work. It’s natural to want that promotion but at what cost. To vie for a promotion, one must sell themselves as being more adequate than the next person. But when the next person is a lover, one must sacrifice loyalty to one or the other. Even if one partner may choose their loyalty to the relationship at some stage, resentment will eat into the relationship like rust.

Dating Someone At Work Disaster #4: Unbalanced power

If the balance of power was even in the first place between peers who enter into a relationship in the office, it may not always stay this way. A boss is in a position of authority over their subordinates. It is difficult to stand equal in other aspects of a relationship when one party is expected to be submissive and obedient during working hours then stand as an equal for the rest of a day.

Dating Someone At Work Disaster #5: Work credibility

Although work credibility sounds like something that would only effect the working environment, and it really should, but tensions created as a result can and do spill over into our relationships.

Quite often, when one of the couple is a position of authority and decision making, their professional judgments can become clouded, not always favoring their romantic partners, either. It is very likely that in a conscious effort not to unfairly promote or praise their partner they will cross the line and decide in the negative, professionally abandoning the better person. Resentment is a likely reaction. This is certainly not an issue for relationships outside of the working environment.

Typically work place gossip is also a factor for the failure of office relationships and work credibility, perhaps the co-workers believe there is some unfair imbalance in office praise or promotion, real or not, the resulting tensions do send a ripple into the private relationship of the office couple.

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