If, after all that’s been said and done, you and your partner still long for each other, then there is still hope. It was love that bonded you in the first place and love save the relationship. However it may not be as easy as you think. Sometimes love is not sufficient. It may involve a lot of will on both partner’s end to save the relationship.
It will involve a lot of effort, drive and resolve to resolve problems to save the relationship. These things do not happen overnight. However first you have to both spell out the direction you would like your relationship to go. Would you want it to forge ahead or just bring it back to where it was before? Knowing and being at one on this will permit you and your partner to set what you and your partner should do to save the relationship. Sit down and talk about it.
The next thing you should do is to determine the problem. Examine yourself and admit to any mistake that you had done that contributed to the problem. Admission is the first step to identifying solutions later on. Encourage your spouse to do the same. Once you have both accepted your own faults then it will be easier to purposely area where you can strike a balance. Remember you both have to agree on this. And if you are to make headway, both of you should be agreeable to commit to this.
Analyze the problem from the perspective of your spouse. This will enable you to have more understanding into why he or she did what he or she did to add to the problem. When you are able to do this, you will appreciate your spouse’s emotions and become aware of how your actions made your partner feel. Have a heart to heart talk on the hurts that one has inflict on the other. Frequently hurting the other was not done on purpose but rather were acts that were just misconstrued by the other. Once you have set this, it will be easier to straighten out the circumstances and move on to save the relationship . It will take committed work on both you and your partner’s end to succeed in this.
Instead of focusing only on the negatives, try to make the discussion more positive by stressing the positive characteristic each one has. Appreciating each other will minimize the tension and promote more sharing between the two of you. When was the last time you showed your appreciation your partner? Could the insufficiency of appreciation be the reason why you fell apart?
Relationships are never untainted. If you are able to make up but slip up again, learn to say you are sorry and acknowledge what you have done. However make sure that you do not commit the same mistake again and again. Your partner can forgive you only so often
When you have done all that you can do to save the relationship and still make a decision that your marriage cannot be saved, then admit to yourself that maybe it is better for both of you to end it. This may be a better alternative than suffering an a life filled with misery.
Source by ZenyZabala